I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
