Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
