Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
So apparently I’m into choking now
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize