Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
