Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm sobbing to NWA
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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