Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
