So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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