I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
