I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
