Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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