We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
