It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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