Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
