its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
