My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
