then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
