Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
