pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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