I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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