But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Less talking, more tequila
Is it penis luge time yet?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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