Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
