I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
