I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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