Tell her she can't have a vagina
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
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