Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
two words...techno handjob
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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