apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
