going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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