he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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