Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
