Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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