Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
