She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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