youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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