The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Be still, my beating vagina.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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