shes about as inviting as chlamydia
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
