life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
