the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
