Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize