in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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