i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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