yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
