none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
