come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
