But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
