she was so not down for the gang bang
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
