i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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