I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
