: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
