i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
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