I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
