i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Randomize
