all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
